Top Ten Miles of 2021

10. The “mile” where I met new people

One of my favorite moments in a run is doing a wide U-turn with the double running stroller to come alongside someone I’ve seen a number of times, have waved at, yet know nothing more about them than their choice of running clothes and cadence. Four such moments stand out from this year as I met BJ, Steve, Helena and Daniel. This is admittedly a mile spread out over a number of runs, yet it is these short moments that become the kernels of friendships. (Indeed, it was a moment like this with Jenny in the early hours of the morning on Dyckman fields that launched a delightful friendship)

“I like your shorts!” Helena made the first move in this relationship. Helena is a fixture on the Dyckman Fields path; always with her trusty dog Lena. For a period of time, her passing comments as I passed by about my shorts (BOA 3 inch shorts with awesome designs!) were the entirety of the relationship. It was pretty one sided – I was affirmed for my weird fashion choices and she had the joy of seeing a lanky white man run by with 3 inch dinosaur shorts. And then one day I decided to stop, ask her name (which I often forget) and started to connect. I learned about her foot pain and the health struggles for Lena while she got to hear stories about our kids growing up and not sleeping at night, but seeing them asleep in the stroller. “Nice shorts” has turned into shouts about “Inwood Breads” – a local bread company that Helena enjoys and has now turned me onto! I will admit that the double chocolate sourdough was delicious! New friends and new breads – what a delight!

9. First mile with hiking poles

“Whatever it is that you just did, please keep doing that” was the communication I received from my legs. Running poles felt like a cheat code. I had been training on the Waywayanda 100 mile course a number of times in preparation for my late September 100 miler when I first got to put my hiking poles to the test. They made hills feel flat and gave energy and balance on technical terrain. I was blown away by my first 13 miles training with them. The first mile with my new poles was on the third loop of the course, which was by far the most challenging loop. However, with the hiking poles, it was like my legs were given new life. I had already run about 13 miles when I picked up the poles for the first time and my legs immediately thanked me.

There was a literal burden lifted from my tired quads as my shoulders and arms started to help carry me across the terrain. This physical boost would be replicated on mile 60 race day when I picked up my poles for the first time. Again, my legs thanked me and my sagging confidence just 20 minutes before melted with the running pole cheat code.

8. Mile 1 of the 2x2 with Jordan

I was shocked when Jordan wasn’t the first one out of the woods. We were running the early July two mile by two mile relay on the Cemetery Hill course at Van Cortlandt park. Jordan had gone out to an early lead going into the woods and was looking strong. However, with the toughest part of the two miles hidden in the woods, I was aware that anything could happen. And indeed it did. Jordan, who had not been running on this course before, was reassured that course marshals would help guide people through the course. So Jordan was trusting when someone (we still don’t know who) pointed Jordan off the course. Less than a minute later Jordan realized the mistake and then had extra distance to cover to make up this strangers errant directions. Jordan still finished the first leg only 30 seconds behind the leader.

Fortunately for me, I was faster than the opponent ahead of me and made up those 30 seconds in the first 400 meters of the second leg. The rest of the two miles, when my lungs weren’t bursting from Cemetery Hill I was left to wonder what happened to Jordan. I was delighted to cross the finish line about 12 minutes later to Jordan’s cheering, hearing this story for the first time while my lungs recuperated from this strenuous effort.

7. Miles with Jordan on the phone

Running was something that saved me during the numerous social restrictions during this COVID pandemic. Running with Jordan was a tremendous gift throughout the struggles of 2020. He was easy the person I saw the most outside of my family as all of my work was on Zoom and Emily and I stayed home most of the time outside of that. Then Jordan went to Florida to spend Thanksgiving with his in-laws and didn’t come back until July!

My Saturdays in 2021 were marked by long run phone conversations with Jordan – it was almost as if we were running together. After yelling at each other over the 1 Train on Broadway, I would arrive in Van Corlandt Park and soon be on the South Country Trail into Yonkers. So in honesty, this wasn’t one simple mile, but hundreds shared with Jordan through the ups and downs of the first half of 2021. Words fall short of expressing the gift these conversations were.

6. The mile where Elena started yelling at me.

“Baaaaaaaaaa-BAH…. Baaaaaaaaaa-BAH”. I don’t know what Elena’s saying, but I do know two things – 1.) She is very cute. 2.) She is longing for interaction.

Seth and Sean both have had their own experiences in the running strollers, covering hundreds of miles every month with dad. Elena has taken well to it, but it seems the most challenging part is the lack of connection she experiences strapped into her closest experience to a minivan. It gets worse because Sean usually dozes off during the first hour of the run. And then comes her call to connection: Baaaaaaaaaa-BAH…. Baaaaaaaaaa-BAH”.

Because I love my daughter and long to connect with her, I do the only logical thing and echo her call: Baaaaaaaaaa-BAH…. Baaaaaaaaaa-BAH”. This goes on for minutes and she often breaks into laughter.

Now we know two more things: 1. This is a great way to connect with Elena. 2. Yes, a white man wearing 3-inch dinosaur shorts, bright colored calf socks and a green bandana while pushing a double stroller in the Bronx can get weirder!

5. First mile running home from the NYC marathon

I love watching people run. And indeed, it may be harder to find a more repetitive sport than NASCAR, but road marathon running is that sport. Not only are the competitors going much slower – 13 mph instead of 200 mph, but it’s also less crowded. In NASCAR these cars are whipping around the track inches from one another and by the end of the marathon, people are often quite spread out. Yet my heart was racing as I ran home from cheering on the NYC Marathon.

This was the first time in my 10 years of living in New York City that I came to watch the marathon. This was another running decision spurred on by Jenny and influenced by the fact Jordan was running in the marathon this year. Sean and Elena joined me to cheer people on and did surprisingly well. I was worried that Sean might run onto the course, but he was much more concerned about all the bicyclists not wearing helmets on the street behind us. We arrived just in time to see the lead men coming through. It’s like getting free tickets to the Super Bowl of running! We were less than 10 feet away as elite athletes sprinted by on their way to victory. AMAZING. It was on that run home that I decided I would run another marathon.

4. Mile 37 of the 50 miler when I was cursed at

“He’s a $%^ing kid!” is currently the second worst thing that’s been said to me on a run - the other one included someone throwing a punch at me, but that was neither a top ten mile, nor from 2021! It was around mile 37 during a do-it-yourself 50 miler I was hosting for myself, with some friends joining. At this point Brendon and Jenny had joined me and we were enjoying some miles around Dyckman fields on this beautiful June morning.

Emily had brought the kids to come and cheer me on and Seth was riding around on his scooter. So naturally, he wanted to ride right at me as my legs were aching and my energy was lagging. “Don’t come at me Seth. Don’t come at me – PLEASE don’t come at me!” Was the progression while Seth continued to come at me. I swerved around him likely rolling my eyes and saying something firmly to my son. This is when the verbal attack was launched by someone on a walk.

For some context – this guy was about six feet tall and maybe 250 pounds. If you were a betting person and happened to take bets on ultramarathoners after 35 miles versus people who are bigger and stronger, then you should have bet on this guy. I wasn’t even sure I could outrun him. I was completely shaken when he yelled at me, “He’s a F(*&ing kid!”

Since I have been growing in emotional intelligence and practicing healthy conflict, I put my skills into practice by yelling back at him, “Are you kidding? He’s my son!” Because of my adept skills, there was an offer on the table, “DO YOU WANT TO GO?” At this point I ran away with my hands raised, officially ending my involvement in this battle.

One of the reasons this mile hits the highlights is because of what happened next – Brendon stuck with me and helped me calm down, getting my breathing back into rhythm and making sure I didn’t start sprinting with adrenaline. Meanwhile, Jenny stayed behind and settled the conflict with the huge guy who was swearing at me! As Brendon and I ran back towards the point of battle (what a joy that this was close to the turnaround on the loop!) Jenny came bounding back towards us, letting us know “Everything’s okay!” What a gift to have friends who are both runners and peacemakers. Even as she’s told me how she did, I still believe it was a hidden superpower unleashed: “Stopping cursing big dude from ripping off the arms of your running buddy.”

3. First run with Elena

It’s become a right of passage for my kids – the first run in a running stroller. Someone somewhere recommends that 6 months is the appropriate age to start bumping your child along in a running stroller and I have listened to that someone and wait six months. The gift of running with my children has allowed me to continue running while my wife continues sleeping. The double running stroller also converts into an urban minivan which is a bonus feature! (This feature is automatically disabled if you transport the stroller in a minivan.) And so in early May, with Elena turning 6 months and Seth quickly growing past the weight limit of 50 pounds, Elena was swapped in for Seth and off we went.

Seth and Sean both had their own first mile experience in the stroller. I had to work Seth up to longer runs as he would grow fussy after the first mile and turn towards screaming by the time I got to mile 2, which often meant 2 more miles of a very upset child and some suspicious stares from those I ran past: “Does he know there’s a screaming child in there?” “Is the child screaming because he’s embarrassed by those shorts?”

Sean had to adapt to sharing the double stroller with Seth, which largely was a non-issue because his big brother would slowly share the treats I bribed him with to convince him that two-plus hour long runs were a good idea.

Elena’s first mile and even her first thousand have been largely a smooth endeavor. I love being able to bring her with me on the runs and find myself a little lonely when I don’t have these small humans in my urban minivan. She now willingly endures jackets, gloves and a hat, Baaaaaaaa-BAHing her way through two hour long runs in the cold with relative peace and joy. I am truly blessed.

2. Mile 100 of the 100 miler

Winning a hundred mile race will be a moment I’ll never forgot. And thanks to Smartphones, even if I did, it will be forever posted to my Facebook account! I was shocked to still have legs after 22 hours and thirty minutes of running and the 200 meters of the video cannot come close to capturing the joy, exhaustion, beauty and elation of the moment.

Dawn was breaking with light blasting through the tree limbs after twelve hours only illuminated by weak headlamps. The first light of dawn after an evening of pitch darkness is a moment of re-birth unto itself. It was like a swallowing up of fear – the noises and red eyes glaring at me in the darkness lost their bite when I morning came. Somewhere deep inside me I long for a similar morning light someday after the darkness of the COVID-19 pandemic.

I’ve run with Robbie twice in my life – once was the last 10 miles (and 5 hours) of my first 100 miler and this time he was crazy enough to join me for 26 miles! His steady presence as fogginess ate away at my brain and fatigue wrecked every corner of my body was a huge gift. With less than half a mile left, I asked him to “run ahead” and get some video of me finishing the race. This was much easier the first 100 mile race when I was barely limping forward.

I was running well at the end of this race and essentially asked him to throw in some tempo pace at the end of a trail marathon which spanned over 7 hours! You can hear the effort in his voice as he started recording when I came into sight. I ran across the line and then attempted to rest on my hiking poles, only to almost collapse before I regained my balance. Multiple dreams came true all at once – I finished a trail 100 mile race, did it in under 24 hours and won: just amazing! And yet there’s another mile that sticks even stronger in my memory from 2021.

1. Mile 87 in the 100 miler

If it’s hard to imagine what running 87 miles over the course 18 hours feels like, I’ll try to help:

1. Everything hurts. Even parts of my body I didn’t know could hurt.

2. I really, really want to sit down and stop moving for a very long time.

3. My feet are prunes from having been wet these entire 18 hours.

4. I’ve started drinking cold brew coffee to help me stay awake.

5. I’ve eaten about 4,500 calories so far: mainly consisting of applesauce, ramen, fruit roll ups and potato chips.

6. A nap (or three) sounds like heaven.

It’s in this space that I get up from my cold camp chair, finish up one last spoonful of piping hot ramen and get my iPod set up. Robbie and I start walking out of the aid station at the inner heat from the ramen is eaten up by the cold and darkness. I know that if I don’t get moving again quickly I will be very cold, very fast. I line up “Bonerama: Live in New York City” and start moving. And that’s when it happens; like someone flicked a switch.

1. Nothing hurts – my entire body feels like it’s on fire in the best possible way.

2. I can’t imagine sitting down – maybe I’ll run fro another 100 miles.

3. My feet are strong and navigating the rocky trail with ease.

4. I will never need coffee again – I have enough energy to create my own coffee!

5. I’m not worried about food. I feel like I’m manufacturing rocket fuel and injecting it into my veins. Who needs applesauce any more?

6. Heaven is right here and right now – complete bliss and utter joy.

I’ve had momentary hits of runner’s high (maybe this is what it is) before – it usually lasts for 2 seconds and is a flash of euphoria – joy and delight that falls through my body like rain, but feels like lightning. Only once ever has it lasted this long before – it was about mile 77 in my first 100 mile race. And for the next 20 minutes of running, my body was on fire.

It was the fastest and most confident running I did all race. My legs felt strong, like a reserve of my best energy was being held somewhere in my body and was dumped all at that moment. My feet were gripping each rock as if with glue – there was no fear in tripping or falling, even while crushing after 18 hours of running. I still struggle to articulate that experience, as words fall so far short of doing it justice.

It also makes me wonder what else is buried deep within me that only comes up after 87 miles of effort (or the equivalent in other tasks). I know I also found compassion I didn’t know existed in me after 5 months of deep sleep deprivation with our son Sean. I’m convinced that we are capable of so much as humans and that quite often the limits we set on ourselves are arbitrary, false and ultimately unhelpful.

And yes, I will be running another 100 miler and seeing if this 87 mile magic exists again!